Sex, et cetera.

Ah, it's 4:59 a.m.. I've been bedridden for hours, dizzy and delusional. Leading to a fight with Tasha about whether or not she gave me a piece of a Charleston Chew in the past 36 hours that I have been sick. It was vanilla, and it happened. Like most of my days, I've accomplished nothing today. My biggest accomplishment was taking one of those quizzes written by an incompetent middle school student who uses 'your' instead of 'you're' (a pet peeve of mine). The quiz is entitled "What celebrity are you" and the girl who took the quiz before me hates me, and she is Hillary Duff- "A colorful trend-setter with lots of friends". The quiz has in-depth mind boggling questions such as "which kind of guys are you most attracted to" and "what did you think of this quiz?" My answers for those were along the lines of "it changes every week" and, "Gay….gay….gay…." Even though I had just wasted 5 minutes of my life, it was all justified when I received my answer. "You are Christina Aguilera- Your a slut." Good. I love her. It made me laugh, mostly because Christina is the most true to herself, not to mention talented, of all the other "celebrities" on the list. Plus I couldn't stop cringing at the grammar of the girl who made the quiz, at least I'm English savvy.

On Friday I hated men. I have never been a radical man hating feminist, and I've never been boy-crazy, a sucker for any little bit of attention. But I do think that it is important for every female to have at least a few punctuated points of man hating in her life. Now men, are suckers. Don't get me wrong, I love them. In fact I tend to be fonder of males than females, especially as friends. They are more laid back, easygoing, and their lives do not revolve around drama. The lives of men revolve around simplicity.

Will I be home in time for the Browns game?

Is Keystone the cheaper version of Coors?

Am I breaking a man law?

Can a cherry be popped twice?

Should I shave my chest?

Do I really need to shower today?

Sex….sex….sex.

These are common things that men think about throughout the course of their day. Of all these questions, I think that guys can unanimously agree that the number one thing on their mind everyday of their lives since their pre-teens is; sex. This is a thought that men have always been stereotyped with, but what about women? Women think about sex just as much, but here is the difference. The question in the mind of a male is constantly "How can I get sex?" Women think about sex too, but in a different manner. As women we ask ourselves, "How can I use sex?"

Now this might sound like a notion to lead to promiscuous behavior, but that isn't always true. Women are born with a manipulative and conniving mentality that men simply are not. For ages we have been considered "the weaker sex", and oftentimes, we play into this. Men feel like they are in control because we usually let them feel that way. Why? Well, it's easier for one, and guys are so preoccupied with things like power and money, that they are completely oblivious to psychology.

I asked some guys the other day, "Why do guys buy girls drinks at the bar?" They didn't have an answer. The common consensus would be either to "get some" or to get the girls drunker, setting the course to more easily attain the first objective. Now I ask a girl why guys buy girls drinks at the bar, and she says the same. When I ask why girls don't usually buy guys drinks, then it makes a little more sense. It's a simple equation, drinks cost money + girls like money= girls like guys with money. So guys will seek out a girl, buy her a drink, and this all comes back to human nature? Maybe. What does any female look for in a mate (not just humans either); security, protection, and fertility. In saying security I mean that the male has the means to take care of her and her potential family. Now you might think I'm getting in a little too deep and off course, but wait. I'm tracking back the simplest action to human nature, because basically, that is how things are. It's as simple as this, buying a girl a drink at the bar is a showing that you as the male possess at least one of the qualities she is looking for. You have money, and you can take care of her.

So what's the point to all this? I guess I am just wondering how every time I make a trip to the bar I end up leaving drunker and with more money then I started out with. However, I don't leave with anyone other than those I came with. Someone like me throws a stone in the whole game. Why is this? This is because I have mastered the art commonly known as "hustling". You can do this in various ways. For example, the last time I went to Kamikazes was with Bauer. Bauer had no money so I stood outside the door until someone walked out. I made conversation with the first guy who walked out and he asked me what I wanted to drink, which is when I told him that it doesn't matter because I can't get in until I get my friend in, and he doesn't have enough money. This is where the 'hustle' comes into play, the guy walks right over to Bauer and hands him money, smiles and tells me to have a good night, and leaves. That guy got absolutely nothing out of that other than my appreciation. Perhaps he was just being a nice guy? Either way my girlish charm worked because I told him what he wanted to hear and gave him the opportunity to assist me in someway. It's the old "damsel in distress" technique, only not.

I just realized, wow I have no point to this. This is an example of me over analyzing my experiences. But what all led to this was my results on the "which celebrity are you quiz". I am Christina Aguilera, I am a slut. Why is Christina a slut? Christina is sexy and she's not afraid to show it, but why does this make her slutty? Now I've all ready heard tonight that I'm saying the same thing every girl says but of course, because it's true. The actions of a female compared to that of a male are a double standard. When I ask a guy friend if he dated a certain girl and he says "no, I just banged her", I don't think of it as a big deal. Then I wonder what anyone would think if I said the same thing about some guy. Most likely I, as the female, have a greater chances of receiving a bad reputation where as the guy earns points. And I realize even more so, that it isn't even guys who stereotype as much as it is girls. There is no reason why any single girl can't go out and make her own choices and do whatever she pleases and have to suffer greater consequences then her male counterparts. When one guy tells me that it seems like all girls are sluts these days, I have to remind him that ever guy a girl sleeps with is another guy doing the same. That's not fair.

It isn't even really all about sex. Well it is, but not the actual act of sex. Girls know what guys want, because guys make it so obvious. Girls use sex to get ahead in this world, in various different ways. Once again, I'm not even referring to the actual act of sex, I'm referring to its psychological counterparts. This is why girls are so much more complex with this subject.

For a girl my age, I've been pretty good about my sexual ways. With the exception of a random phase where I chose to do everything outside of my normal ways, I have a good record. But with that one exception comes a lot of learning, which was the point. First and foremost, I find (for me at least) that there is no satisfaction when you're with a person you don't care about (or attracted to for that matter). I have only re-affirmed to myself how important it is to be attracted to someone, emotionally, mentally, and physically.

On a completely different note, I'm tired of girls being pegged as the ones who are crazy, emotionally unstable, clingy, whatever. Now I of course realize this is true, very often for females. But I guess I have just had some experiences lately that flat out annoy the hell out of me. So I'm going to try to give guys out there a tip. This is only for guys who are genuinely interested in pursuing a respectable girl. For starters, and most importantly, if you don't actually know her, then take some time to do so. This shows simple sincerity, and without this, girls oftentimes won't give you a second thought. Have you ever seen the movie Waiting, where they tell the guy there is nothing a girl hates more than questions like…

What are you thinking about?

What's wrong?

Are you mad?

This is true, but there are some I find much more irritating. Ranking top of my list is, "Am I not good enough for you", or "Am I not good looking enough for you?" Seriously, biggest turn-off ever. If you're a guy and you've used these lines then you've all ready ended your game before the clock has started. Confidence is the key to everything in life. You may not be the best, but you act like you're the best. You carry yourself like you're the best. You present yourself like you're the best. You may walk through life being mediocre but at least constantly striving to be the best. Rule number one, you radiate pure confidence at all times. By asking me if you're not "good enough" for me, tells me you all ready don't think you are, so why would I be interested? This whole tangent I've been on for the past countless paragraphs all come back to the fact that I hated men on Friday, and this is why. Come on guys. Show what you have to offer.



I'm tired of writing for now…I'll finish this later.