Static

April 16th 2007

I'm thinking about what it means to be a human being.

There is this episode of the twilight zone I saw once. There was a guy on a hospital bed who could not see, speak, and had no arms or legs. All the narration in the film was his inner monologue. He laid there, everyday, everynight, hearing everything that was going on around him. All he had were his own thoughts. His life was the epitome of lonliness. He could not express himself because he could not move or speak. But, he was still conscious. All he could do was think....This episode is memorable to me because this represents such an extreme panic. I got anxiety just watching it. That is what it's like to go insane. To have all these thoughts and feelings that you want to express but you have no means of expression. By the end of the episode, he was begging in his mind for someone to kill him. But no one could hear him...and he couldn't even take his own life because he had no appendiges. This is what it means to be a prisoner. This guy had absolutely no freedom. He didn't even have the freedom of death.

I was watching Planet Earth tonight. I watched all the animals do their ritualistic routines, I watched them ruthlessly murder other species, sometimes even their own, for survival. Some of these creatures' entire existence only had one point, and that was to survive through the day. Some other creatures only have a life span of days, sometimes hours, and in that time all they do is mate and reproduce. They live just to reproduce and carry on their pointless existence. I thought about how strange this seemed but then I thought about us. What seperates human beings from all other species of the animal kingdom? What if one creatures short life span, whose only point of life is to create more life than die, what if this sounds strange and pointless to us, but in the larger scale of things, we are just the same. We only have one point in life as well, and that is to maintain our existence. We are born, we live, we reproduce, we die. We just have more time to do it. So does everything in between these events mean anything? Is the rest of what happens in our life only happening because of the simple fact that time exists and something has to happen?

I also noticed how how the predator/prey scene seems ruthless, violent, and incompassionate. So what makes us so different? The only thing that makes us human is the essense of humanity. But humanity isn't natural. Humanity is man made. Humanity was devised as a scheme to create homeostasis. The difference between human beings and animals is intelligence. We are higher lifeforms than all other animals, and that is all there is to it. We are the closest to any potential "God". We have even taken the concept of a divine entity and we have made it in our own image. In the Bible God has been personified so that we can better relate to the idea of him. We don't understand difference. The way I see it is that human beings have weakness, no human being needs to be feared, because every human has a weakness. Our own intelligence is our weakness. The fact that we even possess such a wide array of emotions is our weakness. The humanity we have created is our weakness.

Nature, on the other hand, is ruthless. Nature is volatile and unpredictable. God and nature are the same thing. Just like nature, God is pitiless and unforgiving. This 'merciful' God we have fabricated in the Bible is fiction. Giving God any kind of human emotion or quality is ridiculous and completely counteracts the entire purpose of "God" in the first place. If God had any kind of human emotion, God would have weakness, and would not be the 'divine' entity that has the capability to oversee all of existence.

It's as simple as this; If God were in fact merciful, then good people would not die, horrible things would not happen to those who are righteous. People who are evil would outlive those who are good. But the fact is, if you want to consider God human in any way, God simply points his hypothetical finger at any random person and that person dies. It doesn't matter if that person was good, it doesn't matter if that person was evil...

God. Doesn't. Care.

So why even bother with the constant desire to be civilized and humane?

I did a paper recently on the negative stereotypes that Disney's films portray. I thought the majority of the research I read over was ridiculous. One of the books went as far as to say that the Lion King was sexist. Simply because in the movie the female lionesses are enslaved under the command of the one male lion. The female lionsesses were obedient to their king, despite any outside influences. They were mindless. But this is complete bullshit, because these aren't people, they aren't even animated people, they are animated incarnations of animals. And the fact is, that in the wild, in real life, a pride of lions is led by a male, always. Never in the future will lions undergo a womens sufferage movement. Never will there ever be a female leader. The males are the leaders, and the females are the hunters, they exist to feed the males and reproduce their species. This has never changed, and this will never changed. We are the only member of the animal kingdom who holds any regard to 'civilization'. We are the only ones who long to be politically correct. We are the only ones who try to avoid stereotypes, who strive for equality. That right there is what it comes down to, equality. Equality cannot exist in a hostile and ruthless enviroment. This is what we live in, we live in an enviroment that is completely indifferent to our existence, to our desires, wants, passions, actions, thoughts.

Our planet (nature) and our God, does not need us.

We need them. We need something physical to depend on (nature) and we need something metaphysical to rely on (the incarnation of God). Without the metaphysical to balance with the physical, our existence can only be justified by the fact that we are existing. That's it, there was never, is not, and never will be, anything else.

Remember what I said earlier about human beings being the most intelligent and the closest to God? This is nonsense. Because God is the exact opposite of what we are, everyother animal in on earth is closer to any essense of God. God is only personified as human because God is our own creation. God did not carve us out of his image, we carved him out of our own. In the Bible the importance of admitting that you are a "lesser" being than God is stressed, humility is made a virtue. But in reality, the entire concept of the Christian God is not about comprehending ourselves as lesser beings, but it is the exact opposite, making ourselves equal with "God". It's like the beginning of this blog, we have to justify our existence through expression, and we need someone to express ourselves too, without anyone to understand us we are alone. We don't know how to be alone, we are scared of being alone, we can't comprehend the fact that we may be the most "intelligent" and cognitive being in existence and there is nothing higher than us. We can't except this responsibility, we have to have something to turn too.

My "religious views" say that I do not believe in organized religion, just humanity. This is because humanity is the highest form of religion out there. If we really are the most intelligent beings, than our way of existence, is the highest form of religion. The more intellectual of beings we become, the more we will manifest humanity and the theory of religion to continue to support our reality.

There is no God, just wishful thinking.